General Asset Building
1. Get to know the families of children and youth—not just their names, but their interests, needs, and realities. This will send an important signal that you’re there to serve and support them, not to try to coax them into taking on yet another responsibility in the congregation.
2. Offer parents and teenager workshops on asset-building topics, such as positive family communication and effective decision making.
3. Address family issues in sermons and include in the worship bulletin take-home discussion starters.
4. Encourage public and corporate policies that make it easier for families to build assets.
Support
5. Hold intergenerational family events that bring together members of all ages to socialize and get to know each other.
6. Create “extended family” for young people and parents. Establish an adopt-a-grandparent program, “big brother/sister” relationships, and supporters/mentors for parents.
Empowerment
7. Ask families to be involved in leadership together (e.g., reading scripture in dialogue, lighting candles together, providing special music).
8. Design service opportunities that allow family members of all ages to spend time together, talk about what motivates them, and share their values.
Boundaries and Expectations
9. Coordinate your congregation’s boundaries and expectations for children and youth with parents so that children and youth receive mutually reinforcing messages from both their faith community and family.
10. Offer parent education classes on discipline and boundaries for children and teenagers.
Constructive Use of Time
11. Respect limits on involvement and make the times parents are involved enriching, giving back to the family more than is taken away.
12. Give families opportunities to have fun together. Family sports teams, family choir and other music groups, game nights, camping or canoe trips, and dozens of other activities can be great, nonthreatening ways for parents and their children to spend time together.
Commitment to Learning
13. Sponsor small groups of parents who might study a book, watch a video, or have another form of ongoing, peer-led discussion.
14. Alert parents to parent education opportunities in the community. Have parents sign up, go as a group, and then discuss the topic in a follow-up conversation.
Positive Values
15. Send home discussion questions that prompt parents and their children to talk about values that are raised in their religious education classes, the media, current events, school, or other settings.
16. Help parents get comfortable talking with their children about their own beliefs and values, including values related to sexuality and alcohol and other drugs.
Social Competencies
17. When offering parents workshops, include information and skills that parents can put into action immediately.
18. Give parents and their children and youth opportunities to practice working through problems, conflicts, and differences in healthy ways.
Positive Identity
19. Host a retreat or other event for parents and young people to talk about their hopes and dreams for the future.
20. Provide support for families struggling to identify their own sources of strength and power that give them some control over their own circumstances.
For more ideas, see Embracing Parents: How Your Congregation Can Strengthen Families.
