This post will be an exercise in connecting dots. And in this regard, they’re pretty big dots. As some of you read last week in my post about my older son turning nine, I have a proclivity for recognizing (if not over-recognizing) transitional moments of life, especially with my own children.
Today is another one of those moments. After more than four years, my younger son Peter is at his last day at Calvary Lutheran Childcare. He started going there when he was around a year old, and now he’s there for his last day prior to starting kindergarten. And as is my wont, this day has brought on a flood of ruminations. A lot of life’s “dots” seem to be coming to fruition within these days.
Dot 1: Parenting is a very real thing.
My own parents, Kent and Katherine, read my post about Sam last week with a particular sense of connection as they saw their own son going through the very same moments they went through with me. My thoughts about Sam growing up all too fast and yet my ensuing joy at watching that very development echo their own experience of watching me and my brother grow up. And it doesn’t stop. They are still seeing me grow up and they still wish that I was around more. So as I go into these days of watching the boys grow up, it’s an experience shared by all parents.
For those parents ahead of where I am, I hope there’s some value in watching someone else go through that which you have already passed. For those of you with younger children, maybe some of this gives you pause as you enter into the school years. And for all of you, regardless of whether or not you have children, I think watching kids grow up gives us all the reminder we need to tend to our days thoughtfully and enjoy the time we have. None of us is getting any younger.
Dot 2: Writing as catharsis.
I taught English for a dozen years. Hence, I preached the value of writing down our ideas as a form not only of communication and expression but also as a means of working through questions, tensions, and emotions. To do so in a public realm is even more challenging but potentially even more cathartic. Since sharing some of my thoughts about my own children I’ve had the privilege of engaging in good conversations with others about their own experiences, advice, and reactions.
I told my students consistently: The universal goal in writing is to say something worthwhile about something worth saying something about. It’s hard to imagine something much more worthwhile than appreciating the friends, family, and community that make up one’s own experience.
Dot 3: Thanking our teachers.
As per yesterday’s post, there are few acts as important as giving thanks. And at this time of the year, teachers top the list of our collective attention. And that’s the final dot: Parenting → Writing → Blogging → Thanking
Today I’m in the process of trying to capture in words the overwhelming gratitude and thankfulness my wife and I have for the staff and teachers at Calvary Lutheran Childcare who have been Peter’s constant source of love and attention for the past four years. It’s difficult to put into language the depth of that gratitude, but it’s always worth the effort.
While I’m happy that Peter can count, write, make art, and all sorts of other skills and talents he’s developed in his time at school, I’m profoundly more grateful for the relationships and care he has experienced.
In many ways, that’s the last dot. As a teacher, parent, and employee at Search, I have lived and worked under the umbrella of “relationships are what really matter.” But when you’re experiencing these relationships outside of the theoretical world, instead seeing the tremendous importance these relationships have on your own child, you’re reminded of the ineffable value of having children who know they are loved, appreciated, known, and celebrated.
In a few hours time, we’ll pick up Peter and say good-bye to teachers and friends who have helped make Peter the joy that he is today. I’m guessing that words might escape me at the moment, but the effort will be worth it.
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